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Somewhere along the way, many of us stopped playing.

 

Not all at once. It happened gradually.

One responsibility at a time.

One deadline at a time.

One mortgage.

One school run.

One overflowing inbox.

One "I'll do it when life settles down."

 

Until one day we realised we'd become remarkably good at being adults.

Responsible adults.

Reliable adults.

Busy adults.

Exhausted adults.

 

We learned how to organise our diaries, reply to emails, pay the bills and keep everyone else happy. But somewhere between growing up and getting on with life, many of us quietly forgot to make room for fun. Not because we stopped loving fun. Life simply became fuller. People depended on us. Our responsibilities grew. And somewhere in the middle of all that, fun quietly slipped further and further down the list.

 

We'll learn something new.

We'll start painting again.

We'll make something.

We'll get creative.

Travel more.

Spend more time with friends.

One day.

Those two dangerous little words.

 

The trouble is, life has an extraordinary habit of filling every space we leave for it. If we're not careful, one day quietly becomes never.

Maybe we simply need to start asking ourselves the same question we asked so naturally as children.

 

What sounds like fun today?

 

As children, nobody had to teach us how to play.

We climbed trees because they were there.

We spun around until we fell over.

We made dens out of chairs and blankets.

We sang loudly without caring whether we could actually sing.

We danced because music was playing.

 

One of my earliest memories is at my 6th birthday party in a pretty dress. My knees were smeared with mud from climbing a tree. There was jelly wobbling in those frilly paper bowls. Chocolate cake all around my mouth. I was throwing myself onto the floor every time the music stopped, playing musical bumps as though my life depended on it. Laughing so hard I could barely breathe. Totally in the moment. Totally free.

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When did we stop giving ourselves permission to enjoy life?

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Before things got serious.

School became exams.

Exams became careers.

Careers became mortgages.

Children.

Endless to-do lists.

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We became so busy building a life that many of us forgot to enjoy the one we were already living. Somewhere between responsibility and routine, we quietly stopped giving ourselves permission to play. Not because we no longer loved music. Or laughter. Or dancing.

Life simply became busier. And fun quietly slipped further down the list.

 

It's funny really. As children we couldn't wait to grow up. As adults, many of us spend years trying to rediscover the very parts of ourselves we left behind. Perhaps that's because play was never just play.

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It was freedom.

Curiosity.

Imagination.

Connection.

Being completely present without wondering what came next or what we looked like.

No wonder we miss it.

 

A Part of Us Never Forgot

 

I sometimes wonder whether, beneath everything life piles on top of us, there's a part of us that never loses its sense of wonder.

Call it your soul.

Call it your spirit.

Call it your authentic self.

Call it whatever feels right to you.

I simply have a feeling that, at our very core, we're wired for curiosity, connection and joy. Perhaps that's why music moves us. Why laughter feels so healing. Why we instinctively reach for beauty, nature and shared experiences. Perhaps joy isn't something we have to chase. Perhaps it quietly catches up whenever we have the courage to follow the fun. Our generation danced. Properly. Music wasn't background noise. It was the soundtrack to our lives.

It was friendship.

Identity.

Belonging.

Freedom.

 

A few years ago, a friend gave me his old DJ decks, knowing I'd always fancied having a go. Then one of my sons borrowed them.

He became rather good. Eventually he upgraded to newer, shinier decks, and mine quietly found their way home again.

So I started learning. And I absolutely love it. Not because I have dreams of headlining Tomorrowland... Although never say never!

But because it reminds me that it's never too late to discover something that simply makes you smile.

 

This year I celebrated my birthday dancing at a music festival with my son and his friends. Seven hours. Apparently, I had it in me after all. Everything held together remarkably well. Although I won't pretend I didn't sleep like a baby afterwards. Watching the sun go down, surrounded by music, laughter and the positive energy of thousands of complete strangers, I remember thinking...

Why don't we do this more often?

Not necessarily festivals.

Just...

feeling alive.

 

That feeling stayed with me long after the music stopped. Because it wasn't really about dancing. It was about remembering what it feels like to be fully present. To stop thinking about yesterday. To stop worrying about tomorrow. To lose yourself in a moment so completely that, for a little while, nothing else matters. And perhaps that's what following the fun is really about. Not escaping life. Stepping more fully into it.

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Healing Doesn't Always Look Like Healing

 

Over the years I've come to realise something. Healing doesn't always happen in the ways we expect.

Sometimes it happens in stillness.

Sometimes through conversation.

Sometimes through quiet reflection.

But sometimes...

It happens when a favourite song comes on unexpectedly.

When someone smiles at us.

When we laugh so hard we forget, just for a moment, everything we've been carrying.

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I don't believe joy and responsibility are opposites. In fact, the more responsibility we carry, the more important fun becomes.

Science is beginning to catch up with what many of us have instinctively known all along.

Music changes us.

Movement changes us.

Connection changes us.

When we dance, our breathing slows, stress begins to ease and our bodies release chemicals that help us feel happier, calmer and more connected. We stop living entirely in our heads and come back into our bodies.

And that's often where healing begins.

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Perhaps that's why music has been part of every culture throughout history. Perhaps that's why people have gathered around fires, celebrated together, sung together and danced together for thousands of years. Not because it was frivolous. Because it was human.

We were never designed simply to survive. We were designed to live.

To celebrate.

To connect.

To move.

To belong.

 

Why I Created TranscenDANCE

 

TranscenDANCE grew out of everything I've been talking about here.

A love of music. A belief that healing doesn't always have to happen in therapy rooms. And a desire to create a space where people can breathe, move, laugh, connect and simply be themselves.

There are moments to reflect.

Moments to release.

Moments to laugh.

No choreography.

No judgement.

No pressure.

Just permission.

Permission to stop overthinking.

Permission to stop adulting for a while.

Permission to move.

Permission to smile.

Permission to reconnect with the wonderfully imperfectly perfect human being you already are.

 

Doing what I do, I've spent many years creating safe spaces for healing.

With TranscenDANCE, my intention is to create safe spaces for joy.

Because I don't believe joy is something we earn once everything else on our to-do list is finished. I think joy is one of the ways we heal. Perhaps the greatest gift we can give ourselves isn't another productivity hack, another self-help book or another promise that we'll start living once everything is sorted. Perhaps it's something much simpler.

 

To remember how to play.

To dance because we can.

To laugh more.

To notice sunsets.

To sing in the car.

To walk barefoot on the grass.

To hug people we love for a little longer.

To say yes to adventures.

To choose experiences over excuses.

To stop waiting for life to begin.

 

Because here's the beautiful truth.

Life has already begun.

It's happening now.

This moment.

This breath.

This song.

This dance.

This conversation.

 

Maybe the journey back to yourself doesn't begin with a dramatic life change.

Maybe...

It begins with asking yourself one simple question.

 

What sounds like fun?

 

Then, if you possibly can...

Follow it.

Not because it's the sensible thing to do.

Not because it's the productive thing to do.

But because life was never meant to be this serious.

 

Follow the Fun... Today

 

Today, give yourself permission to play.

Not because you have to.

Not because it's productive.

Not because anyone expects you to.

Simply because it makes you smile.

 

Need a few ideas?

• Do something your six-year-old self would absolutely love.
• Build, create, paint or make something purely for the fun of it.
• Lose track of time doing something you love.
• Choose fun over sensible - just this once.

 

Or perhaps your fun thing isn't on this list at all.

Perfect. Follow that instead.

 

Because life isn't measured by the number of things we get done.

It's measured by the moments that make us feel alive.

 

Follow the fun.

Trust yourself.

Joy has a wonderful habit of catching up.